Nicole this one is for you as promised. Ironically it involves friends and friendships. Nicole is one of my daughters best friends, has been since grade school. I promised her a new post before the end of the week.
I read the story this morning of Jonathan and David. The story of Jonathan risking his own life to find out if his father Saul was out to kill David. I read the story of their friendship, of their devotion to each other, of their bond and their pact to look out for each other and each others families. I realized that I am blessed to have a couple of those kinds of friends in my life. Women who are willing to stick their neck out for me and sometimes say, "Where are your motives on this?" "Is your heart in the right place here?" Those friends who are not afraid to call me out, who are not afraid to ask me the hard questions. Those who are not afraid to hold me accountable because they know I will do the same thing for them.
This week I text one of those friends. I hadn't sat down and talked to her in awhile, so I wasn't real sure what was going on in her life. She is one of those friends that even when we haven't connected in awhile I still know she is praying for me. So as I was praying for her on the way to work that morning, I felt God nudging me to send her a text. If you've read here before, you know I don't always respond as quick as I should. Sometimes I am like, really God I don't know, what will she think? I was like God, I don't know what she has going on right now. I don't know if this applies to anything in her life. (repent - I know) After a couple of nudges I sent the text. It simple stated "felt God nudging me to ask you if there are any unrealistic expectations you need to put aside".
At first she said "I don't really think so, she said there is one area I have been struggling about a little". Which made me feel like, well you misread that one. After texting, and emailing back and forth during the day she said, you know maybe I do need to spend some time in prayer about this one area. Ironically it was an area of service. This particular friend is very dear to my heart, because in many areas I see her as my mini-me. I see her struggle with things my younger self struggled with and I want to steer her through it. I want to help her along. One of those areas is unrealistic expectations.
We all have unrealistic expectations. We have them in others, we have them in ourselves. I have really tried lately to put aside some of those unrealistic expectations. I have stopped putting so many on myself, and I have tried to do away with some I had in others. I don't think I have to do it all anymore, and I don't think everything has to be perfect. I quit expecting that Brett should be able to read my mind. How unrealistic was that? And how unfair was that to him!
After chatting back and forth with this friend I realized there was an unrealistic expectation aspect I hadn't thought a whole lot about. The unrealistic expectations that we, in our mind think, that God has in us. I come from a very performance based, people pleasing background. I am not really sure how much of that was put on me by others, or how much I have just placed on myself. But it is there.
So I struggle with "performing for God". Don't hear me wrong. God wants us to serve, he "expects" us to serve. Pastor Robbey recently preached, God doesn't expect us to just sit back on our hands, or clap our hands and just worship, he expects us to serve.
The problem becomes when my service becomes my offering. Hosea 6:6 says "I want you to show love, not offer sacrifices. I want you to know me, more than I want burnt offerings." God clearly states the main expectation he has for me is a relationship with him. So often I place the expectation on myself that the service, the sacrifice, the performance is what he wants. That is an unrealistic expectation that I need to put down. What about you? Are you offering up sacrifices and burnt offerings? Or are you offering up a relationship filled life that centers around the creator of relationships?
Thanks for reading!!!
