I SAID NO

Recently I watched a young Mom in the store.  She was struggling with a "willful" 3 or 4 year old.  She was basically arguing with him.  Never a good idea and most times ends bad for the parent.  I felt for her, I remember those days.  I wanted to cheer her on.  Instead I watched the scene unfold.  She started out strong with,  I said NO.  The child just kept going, he kept getting louder and people started staring.  I give her some credit she held out for a little while but eventually gave in.

I thought of that this morning, as I was praying to God for something I have been praying about for a long time.  I wondered if I sounded like a "willful" 54 year old.  I think God wants us to continue to bring our hearts desires to him, but not in a begging way.  Not in a temper tantrum way.

He reminded me of another time I prayed, and I begged, I got angry and I pouted when I didn't get my way.  But he is a "good, good Father", and in that situation, when I could see the end, God was protecting me and my family in ways that I could not even imagine at the time.

Saying no to our kids isn't mean parenting.  God says no to us on numerous occasions.  He does it because he loves us and protects us.  We are becoming a nation that doesn't know how to tell our kids no.  Which means in turn we are raising a generation of kids who do not know how to deal with rejection or not getting their way.  When they don't know how to deal with no, then they turn to drugs, alcohol, pornography,  and relationships.  Searching for something to fill the void of rejection, because we have not taught them how to deal with a reality of life NO.

My kids would push the limit, they were not saints.  Yet, at the same time I think I must have had a look that said this is the line and don't step over it.  They knew they were free to continue past that line, they also knew there was the chance of consequences if they did.  I think God lets us push also, but we have to realize there may be a point, if he has thrown out tons of barricades in our path, maybe he is telling us we should switch paths.

1 John 4:18a  says "Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear."

God's love is always perfect, whether I accept it that way or not doesn't change that it is.

Good parenting is always good parenting whether your child accepts it that way or not doesn't change that it is.